Darling, this is such an excellent quote about grief because it rightly addresses the fact that healing can take many forms.
You can’t tell for yourself, much less for anyone else, how sadness will take you or how you can recover. For some it’s travel, for others its hard work or lying in bed eating chocolates – nothing in excess we hope, but sometimes life simply throws you off-kilter and there is nothing to do but get through it.
The ‘you can’t tell ahead of time’ aspect is very important – losing Lawrence last year was much more distressing than losing other people from my life. For some people losing a pet is more painful than a human friend.
And sorrow steals up when you are unaware, it’s all going fine and suddenly you are weeping inconsolably over a broker saucer.
Even Etiquette Central does not have the answer to every question: how long will it take to feel better and what should I do to feel better are insoluble.
For some people it’s time – for other distractions – for some, nothing works, but one morning you wake up and you are somehow content and at ease again. Don’t ever tell others how to grieve and if you are lost yourself, salt water (tears, sweat and the sea) are as good a place to start as any other.
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